in limbo

i randomly surfed the net trying to numb my brain from the painful wave of memories engulfing me at the moment... then i saw my previous post. 4 months= same stupid dilemma


what could be worse than knowing you are still rooted at the same darn spot after all the awakenings and unmistakable revelations that you've seen?


what could be worse than knowing that the brilliant mind that God gave you still remain unused when it comes to your personal happiness (and misery)?


am still here.... in a trance.... after God knows how many cycles I've been into. still nursing that glimmer of hope in my heart that there could be a possible happily-ever-after in this story...


still caught up in the smoke of illusion... in the state of denial...


my heart constricts, my soul cries deeply..
i still ache, i still hurt, i still hope....